As usual, it's late, but last thursday, my beautiful daughter turned five.

Unlike some mothers, I don't feel sad that my baby isn't a baby anymore, I do look back with fond memories of her as that little bundle, but I also relish the time now in the present, when she is turning into an an 'actual' person, with her own ideas and views, and every week, if not day, she surprises me (in a good way) with something she draws or says.

Nowadays, she can almost match me in the stroppiness stakes, which can be a little unnerving sometimes, but even if we disagree on somethings, I understand why she feels the way she does, it can't be easy having to do everything that someone else tells you to all the time.

That's not to say that we fight all the time, actually when ever we are out and about, people always compliment me and her on her behaviour, and say what a sweet intelligent little girl she is.

of course, I know all this and more, she is my most special person in the world.

and when I feel sad with myself that I have lost my patience and shouted at her too quickly, or fobbed her off with the excuse 'in a minute' for too long, I will always remember a thing she said not too long ago, when I was telling her that she should listen to Danny when he told her how to behave. "but Mummy" she said "you're a much better boss than Daddy is." Now I know that really she apprieciates my 'guidance', and I don't feel so bad.

To my darling Ella, I love you so much, and I can't wait to see how much more you have grown as a person this time next year, and to find out the wonderful things you have achieved in your 5th year.